It is difficult to adjust to new settings, to change perceptions of yourself and your role. We become accustomed to who we are. There is no need to ponder and reflect once we know what is…and what will be.
We no longer have need for words such as: Fate and Destiny…because, good or bad, they are our now. When we ponder – future – we simply ‘rinse and repeat.’ Spontaneity and discovery are words reserved for our past – our youthful adventures…for today we are far too responsible for such frivolous behavior.
Few people proclaim that this is how they had “dreamt it up.” That, today, is their culmination of dream and wonder…yet, they continue marching to the same dull drum in order to maintain this norm.
Life can be like riding a carousel – round and round – trading one painted horse for another, but the destiny is always the same. Turn after turn…miles behind you, yet the journey and the destination remains the same.
It is difficult to adjust to new settings, to change perceptions of yourself and your role. To get off of the carousel.
When I was a child, my favorite past-time at the playground was to be spun on the small merry-go-round – pleading with friends or my grandfather, “Faster! Faster!” Life flashing by me…I felt like any moment I would take off and fly miles and miles away. Holding on, white knuckled, my entire person wanting to escape the motion of endless spinning. I would fight the urge to be freed from this contraption until, slowly, she would come to a stop. Right where I started.
Sometimes, in life, something happens – your grip comes loose and you are thrown, tossed, spit out…at first you are disoriented, then you make sure you survived your flight (however short it may have been), then you decide to try and get back on (I hope I’m not the only one who’s tried to jump on a fast spinning merry-go-round!), and then you realize that you don’t want back on…afterall your head spins, your stomach aches, and the world is unsettled whilst going round and round.
It is difficult to adjust to new settings, to change perceptions of yourself and your role.
Sometimes it is best to be thrown from the merry go round because now I find myself, right now, staring at that from which I was tossed. Still wishing I could have hung on a bit longer, still feeling dizzy and queasy from the ride. But I am also realizing that there are other things in this life’s playground. Swing-sets. Sliding Boards. Teeter Tots.
Maybe someday I will try my luck at the carousel again…but today I think I may just go for a walk and see what else is out there, to be spontaneous and to discover.
It is difficult to adjust to new settings, to change perceptions of yourself and your role. Today I become an explorer and trailblazer, scouring the landscape looking for adventure, putting miles behind me and watching the landscape change before me.
This is who I am becoming. What about you?
5 thoughts on “Round and Round…I went.”
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My prayers are with you on your journey
I do remember feeling quite like I had lost my grip on a merry-go-round when I first started hearing some of your teachings. Actually, I felt like I landed hard on my back and had the wind knocked out of me. It was painful…and I sat stunned for a while, looking around, not sure which direction to head because all I had ever really known was the merry-go-round.
You know the rest of the story…that I ventured to the swings…and the slide…and the teeter-totter…and I look back and realized how much I would have missed if I would have just gotten back on the merry-go-round….all the unbelievably amazing friends I wouldn’t have known.
I know that the miles you walk will present you with new challenges. I also know that they will present you with people, places and opportunities not to be missed.